~~This Time It's Different by Evans Blue~~

Language Barriers?

Saturday, September 29, 2012

~~What Happened to Me?: Life Post~~

Kiddies, this is gonna get personal....

What happened to me?

I shouldn't be this way.

I should be innocent.

Shouldn't be a slave.

Shouldn't be this way.

I mean, I'm fifteen.

I don't know what's happened to me.

I'm older now.

So much older....

I will never regain my innocence, but god I wish I could. I want to go back to when I didn't have a serious thought in my head. Back to when my biggest problems were being bullied. Back to when I had free time. Back to when I believed in goodness. Back to when I was HAPPIER. Back to when my Figments were closer. Back to when I told my family everything. Back to when I was okay. Back to when I was a motherfucking kid.

I don't even remember the last time I truly felt my age.

I've....I've been hurt, and I don't know when I'll ever get past what I've been through.

I wish I could change the world, go back to who I used to be.

I wish I could be better.

But I honestly doubt I'll change.

I'm fifteen, and...And everything I've been through..

Is going to effect me for a very long time.

Do I have any regrets?

I'd be lying if I said I didn't.

However, I also know they're useless.

If what had happened to me hadn't happened....Who would I be right now?

It's impossible to tell.

Would I be better, or worse?

I wish I knew....

Whatev, I am who I am. That's all there is to it.

I'd be lying if I said I loved myself.

I'd be lying if I said I hated myself.

I'm...Fine, with me.

I'm not good.

I'm not bad.

I'm a bad apple.

I'm more than that, though.

I'm a Gothic Lolita as well.

I'm hurt.

I'm scarred.

But I'm not in this alone.

I have my Glowstone with me.

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